Fearing Fear (Part 2)
There's more..?
In this two-part article, Pondering Potato presents a guest writer.
This is a continuation of Part 1. Read it if you haven't!
In Part 1, I wrote about internal fear – good internal fear and bad internal fear. Now, let's move on to external fear.
External Fear
Contrary to internal fear, there are many elements that go more macro and are out of our control albeit having a huge effect on us both literally and laterally as a society. Instead of good and bad, I will approach this from an evitability angle. Evitability is relative and subjective – but there are some things that are pretty constant.
Inevitable External Fear
Peace. Chaos. Order. War. I am a strong believer of the need for law for order, fear for peace. This might sound controversial for some. But without going too much into the depths political, geo-political, and economic arguments, a society without fear only breeds contempt, entitlement, and lawlessness.
Would we want that for our society? From lawmakers to law-enforcers, do we want our society to become like those we see on screens? I prefer to walk over to buy my groceries in peace. The law is not perfect (trust me, I have been let down multiple times – I can share alongside my ghost stories), but it is rather inevitable. Although I am disappointed that our bench is politically linked (my observation and no one else's), the respect for the law is one of the few things that keep civil harmony. Remember – as much as you are imperfect, the law isn't too.
I am a strong believer of equity. Take note I said equity and not equality. I believe that although everyone is born into the society into somewhat different tiers, and even more broadly in the world in deviated global north and south, one must work to progress oneself. Fruits do not and should not drop from the trees or taxes. Why am I paying for your laziness? You are afraid of being replaced but you are skiving? We can fight over this if you want to take this further but I will ignore you if I think you are just a senseless woke.
Many nowadays talk about individuality – do what you want, be who you want, however you want. I am from the creative industry. I know what you mean to a tee. But hey, the reality is Singapore is so small and rather insignificant globally that if we do not fear becoming completely irrelevant, we will really become it. We need to have that fear of losing out (or our jobs will be replaced by both man and machine). We need to have the reminder of not becoming complacent. We need to not become sloths both masses and policy-makers.
It does not take a genius to see how comfortable we have become in a few short decades. But we don't build our future based on the past. Just look at Manchester United. LOL they are so funny I have to take this chance to laugh at them. The truth is Singapore is in a very vulnerable geo-political situation where the multitudes of economic changes can affect everyone easily. In simple terms – you snooze you lose.
Evitable External Fear
What can be avoided and adjusted would be one's perspective in life and of life. But my constant belief is you can chart your path. Life is unfair. There are only two things I can confirm with you in 2025: (1) Life is unfair, (2) Liverpool is gonna win the league. Many people like to lament their families, upbringing, society, governments, state of affairs, how people let them down, how they look like Dust Bin instead of Hyun Bin, etc. I get it. Trust me (especially the Dust Bin part). Like how I tell my football boys when I coach them (career changing impending),
"If you cannot change the reality, you need to change your position."
How do we do that? In football, if that opponent is blocking your passing lane, you move your position. He ain't gonna move for you. Just try driving in Singapore where we have the worst drivers. You signal politely and the oncoming car will speed up and cut you and scold your mother's private parts.
Either you can be like me or be like my wife. I will leave you to guess who does what.
In life, if whatever reality is pushing you down, you have to shift your perspective. I have a few childhood friends who are born into lower income families. Without selling their souls (but definitely working their asses off), they are now living a great life built by their own hands.
Back to my point on equity – I believe in education, opportunities, and character. These are the things we can build upon to overcome the fear. Education (not just in schools but un-narrow worldviews) gives knowledge. Knowledge, or the hunger for it, gives people the notion to seek opportunities.
Every generation will have their own fear but when you chart it on a timeline horizontally, they are kind of similar isn't it? Feed families, lead better life, etc. What is interesting is: character is very much undermined nowadays. Trust me, every Tom Dick and Harry will say they believe in character – so spare me. They will bold and underline INTEGRITY when they are playing you in your faces.
But character is when we are able to overcome fear with empathy and grace, not jealousy and hate. It is when we can shift our position from entitlement to contentment.
I am not asking you to accept it when the joker minister brings up comedic suggestions in parliament. I am saying that if you earn this much for now but want to go Alaska for 60 days for holiday, perhaps consider up-skilling yourself and get a better paying job or go to somewhere nearer instead.
That is something evitable and within your control. Or save up better and drink less bubble tea. The society and social media imposes tons of fear on us through mainstream and gray literature that we consume. The only way out for us – apart from going to live in a cave – is to decide how we receive and process them. My client flew a helicopter in to watch Jurgen Klopp's final Liverpool match at Anfield. Here I am laughing at Man Utd. Not the same, but feels good too.
Conclusion
I chose to be colloquial and not to go too deep to discuss politics, economics, and other stuff that can be all debatory (yes I made this word up). The thing I hate most is ignorant convoluted entitlement. They talk a lot but mean nothing. That said, these are the four simplified categories of Fear that I have always categorised things and people around me.
- Good Internal Fear – my favourite. Don't be afraid. Live well, think well, be a good person. Things go wrong sometimes. You will fail and make mistakes. To win you need to learn to lose. Have faith. Play on.
- Bad Internal Fear – I stay away and I cut them. These incidents and people aren't worth my time. Vampires drink your blood and still blame you for bleeding while acting like angels.
- Inevitable External Fear – important to identify and understand situational and society realities. Knowledge is key. Insularity is a plague.
- Evitable External Fear – If you cannot change the reality, you need to change your position. Contentment triumphs Entitlement.
The path is for us to walk. People think there is an end goal and fear walking towards it. Walk on. The truth is the path keeps changing anyway and the fear of walking will always be there. Incidents will occur like the bird pooping on my head as I was walking home when I was 12 years old. That was how my hair growth became exponentially expedited. Let courage, faith, grace, and heart be your four musketeers. And this is when I say....
You'll Never Walk Alone.
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